Archive for December, 2009

Sweater weather

Posted in Uncategorized on December 26, 2009 by Cristina

Photo censored for obvious reasons. A week ago I was helping my mom go through her closet encouraging her to donate old hideous clothes and found this preciousness. This scratchy wool monstrosity features interesting sleeve asymmetry, 3D apple embroidery and still had the tag on it ($8 from a thrift store). I requested an explanation for this purchase, trying to keep a straight face. The straight face lasted half a second and both of us burst out laughing at the fact that she’d paid $8 for this, eight dollars! I decided to wrap it up and regift it, you know, as an awesome joke. The gift receiver was a good sport and wore it all Christmas day, maybe because the extreme hangover from Christmas Eve translated to numb indifference. Or maybe it was because of the many seasons of rigorous hideous-sweater-training:


Parentless Christmas

Posted in Uncategorized on December 25, 2009 by Cristina

Christmas this year was blissfully parentless. No stress, no drama, no “kids” table, no unfortunate conversations. After little present exchange, the hangovers subsided with a delicious brunch, our minds were blown by the mind-blowing 3D version of Avatar (fell in love with the eyefat-endowed Sam Worthington) and we made a delicious dinner with some feline help (a little gross, I know… we sterilized before cooking):
The night ended perfectly with an in-bed screening of my new favorite movie: Across the Universe! My sister and I welled up with happiness every other minute at the all-Beatles soundtrack that was seamlessly interwoven with a love story, wowsers! I actually said, “Ok, I need to buy this as a present for every one of my friends.” I can think of few things that could have made this day better… like if Santa Claus or Jesus had shown up in person.


Posted in Uncategorized on December 5, 2009 by Cristina

So I went to the annual foreign language department party at a professor’s house last night. This is a run-down of the noteworthy bits: 

1. Played ping pong until I decided that my dress was too short for such an activity in front of my peers and professors (took about a minute of picking up stray balls for this decision to take place).
2. Taught some people jeringonza, the Spanish version of piglatin that the title of this entry is written in (pssst, the word is fiesta).
3. Talked to a current professor about my passion for photography and when he asked if I had a website, I just mentioned an “inappropriate blog” that I couldn’t share with him…you know, because I’m professional, hah.
4. Met my professor for next term, the one that’s rumored to make people cry in class; with one succinct hand gesture, I explained my level of familiarity with Plato and research methods (I’d guess that my hand was at knee-level).
5. Played a non-drinking-game during which we took turns saying a word in our language to see who comes comes closest to guessing the definition. The winning answer for my Romanian “sclipici” which means glitter turned out to be someone’s guess of prostitute, haha! Today, I wanted to verify whether there is indeed a strong glitter-prostitute correlation and a Google image search of “sclipici” gave me this affirmative answer:

6. Talked to a hipster-looking librarian about what the 900s in the Dewey Decimal system represent.
7. Drank a whopping total of two beers and a butterfly-flower-patterned paper cup of red wine.

Wild night.

Doomsday Shroomsday

Posted in Uncategorized on December 3, 2009 by Cristina

Lately, I’ve been noticing a common and disturbing theme among friends and strangers… the idea that we’re quickly headed toward world apocalypse. A couple of months ago while enjoying a sunny-day walk through the East Village, I stumbled upon this warning:

Lame! I haven’t seen that 2012 movie because 1. it’s probably too mediocre to pay $12 for and 2. I haven’t been in a movie theater since I heard about a friend getting bed bugs from the seats. A world bed bug infestation would spell the end of the world for me. 
A few weeks later, a friend shares this quote, “The pretense of substance and vitality that the spectacle once afforded us has now expired, and we live on the corpse of spectacular society, deceiving ourselves that it still lives and breathes.” Ummm, I agree with most of this… we can’t just consume willy-nilly any longer. But where, oh where to find another corpse? I’ll let the politicians & scientists & economists decide that one as I work hard on making sure the maggots on our current corpse speak Spanish… you never know, it might be useful on the next corpse.  
Again in the doomsday-riddled East Village, I encounter this unnerving sight that almost made some old couple trip while they were gawking at it with frightened eyes:
If I really think about it, which I guess I am now, this is just a discarded boring world globe that rolled over to the sewery curb. No need to get too alarmed about how dramatic it looks. More than pollution, I’m alarmed at stupidity. Sometimes I hear people say strange things when I’m in public and when I do, I try to write these things down so that I can be entertained by them later.  Riding the MAX the other day, I hear this conversation between Idiot 1 and Idiot 2 which I’ve crudely recreated for you here:
No, folks, that’s not a typo… Idiot #2 actually said “Global Warning.” Methinks those warnings of global warmings can be heeded through education and cutting back on a life of excess. It’s easy to get carried away with doomsday theories and start pulling your hair out in despair, but that doesn’t do much good. As a public service to lower anxiety, I’ve created the following easy-to-use flowchart to help you in these uncertain times:
Peace out, I’m off to follow flowchart instructions.